Tag Archives: dreams

Woof

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I had a dream about my Siberian Husky, Blizzard. We were going for a walk, except it started with driving with him in the passenger seat of my Amigo, top down as a puppy.

We ended up walking around my hometown. He was a full grown dog at that point in my dream. We were looking for my son. I woke up before we made it to my moms house.

When you have dreams like that, they carry a sense of dread. My Blizzard is gone; but I still feel him and that memory always comes with a slight sliver of pain and sadness. I miss him a lot.

So I decided to draw to help me grieve a little. It’s weird to me because I’ve seen the equivalent of a small village dead at once. I’ve seen severe human suffering.

But it’s always the small, personal wounds to my payche that stay. I feel like I should forget at some point.

But I probably won’t.

I hope I don’t.

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Bounce [re]

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Once upon a time, I used to want to go into space. I was good at math and thought I wanted to fly. Then I chased a bullfrog into one of those rain culvers under a dirt road….

….and got stuck.

I went from annoyed to scared fast. I yelled for help, no one heard me. It took about an hour and I found that I could only go forward, so that’s what I did. I stayed calm and freed myself.

Later I watched the Android Bishop do the same thing in the movie “Aliens” and had an anxiety attack. I didn’t know what it was; I just couldn’t breathe and felt as though the room was closing on me. Then I learned that you have to be strapped in and still for training and actual missions and I knew that wasn’t for me.

I needed to be free.

But I never lost my love for space. Watching the shuttles, Voyager, Skylab. It all seemed so, BIG.

Then, one day, I was given a chance to work for NASA, as a contractor. The people bringing me in didn’t know it, but I was so excited!! By then we had Hubble and we’re building the International Space Station. Still launching shuttles. Getting ready to go to the moon again. I was proud to have a PIV card that said that I was at Goddard Space Flight Center. It made me so happy.

But I forgot that happy is a temporary state.

Is Deep

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      Thumbnails can be fun as long as you can keep from going overboard.Which I rarely attempt to do.

     So instead I let myself have fun with it; I take it however far it can go. Sometimes I make a simple drawing; others I get the lizard, lol. 

      I guess what I’m saying is that I’m learning to remove the limits I put on myself. That’sa good thing.

      Right?

Wubadubbawubwub

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In case you don’t understand the current reaction…

End of rant. On to art.

    So after a particularly vivid nightmare, started working on this script this week. It took five hours; this surprised me.

      You see, when I was a kid(hell, even now lol) I loved comics. Especially Marvel. Being artistic and all, I figured it was a cinch that I’d work there one day. I looked forward to it and one day I took a bold step. 

    I sent in a bunch of panels. 

     After what felt like I a century I got a letter. A rejection letter. I was crushed and decided maybe I wasn’t meant to be an artist after all. That I’d have to settle for my back up career as test pilot or astronaut. My drawing was covered in red ink corrections, a sure sign of authority. Damn.

     Years later I met the guy who sent me that letter, Jim Shooter. I told him about it and he asked how old I was when I did it. Six, I replied.

      The man was inconsolable. He actually teared up and told me he was sorry about it. He asked if I’d put my age on it. Hadn’t considered that. “No.” If I still drew. At that time, the answer was no. 

    I’m fine. My life has been a comic of sorts, full of adventure travel and tragedy, hahaha. No I didn’t become an astronaut, but I worked for NASA and met several. I even have a piece of Hubble’s old thermal shield, brought back after the lens repair mission.

   And I draw again. I don’t have any dreams attached to my art anymore. It’s for me mostly, with an occasional commission thrown in, mostly for ego sake. 

      Because I love art😉.