Tag Archives: love

Greydae Blue

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      Aaargh! I lost more of my pencils! This couldn’t happen at a worse time. Since I was in D.C., I decided to go online and search for art supply stores in the area. Not only did one turn up, they had the original mixed media prismacolors!

    I immediately struck out to get to their store. The first leg of the journey was easy; I got on the redline of the metro and rode until we arrived at the North Farragut entrance. Took the escalator up into a gloomy Washington day. Then I had to walk up K street.

      For four blocks.

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Was I happy to see this place!

       Of course I became turned around until a good Samaritan told me that it was in the building next to the CVS store on the other side of the street. Once there I walked up to the counter with a little trepidation. Maybe they sold out or didn’t carry them anymore. I was suddenly nervous.

     “Do you guys carry prismacolor pencils? “I asked, barely concealing my anxiety.

     Yes! Yay!

     The staff was very friendly and courteous to me and I was able to acquire my prize.

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Mission accomplished!

       Suddenly remembering I’d used up an hour of my 30 minute lunch,  I thanked them profusely and left. It seemed so much brighter outside. Hadn’t it been raining when I got here? Oh well…

Hardness

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         I’m heading on to my next drawing. Because I have to complete a lot of them, I’m getting a lot of practice. With all of the time I’m spending on this, I actually feel more centered and peaceful.

         My girlfriend is being pretty understanding, so I try to do nice things for her, like restaurants and stuff. After all, being supportive is important to me. So I fully intend to return the favor.

        In fact, since I dedicated myself to drawing, my life has gotten better. I shouldn’t be surprised though.

        My art feeds from any negative emotions or experiences in my life. I’ve always known this intellectually. But there was a decade long span in which I didn’t draw. I was angry and hurt.

       My wife left me.

        I instinctively began drawing after my suicide attempt.

      I’ll admit it; I sucked hard at first. But I felt better. But something was missing and it took awhile to get it. Darkness and sadness can’t be allowed to build up or it can overwhelm you. I let my pride in my own resistance blind me to my truth.

      …I guess I’m a good person. I just feed on bad emotions. Mine. Yours.

      Feed me.